Mother of a Clubfeet Ballerina Part 2

 When I met my princess for the first time I couldn' believe how perfect she was. I admired and inspected every inch of her but I couldn't bring my self to look at her feet and when I finally did I burst into tears.  Her feet curled up made the perfect little heart <3.  I was only able to admire her little heart for a week before the casting journey began. 

The first visit was so difficult I cried into my moms arms while she fell asleep as her orthopedic used the Ponseti method (casts) to correct her legs! OK...so this was the easiest one of them all it only got worse as the visits progressed.  The next day I had to return because she cried the whole night...the cast must have felt uncomfortable to her and not to add HEAVY!!  The orthopedic sent us home said she was fine and to just keep an eye on her little toes to make sure she had circulation going to her legs and feet.  Every Wednesday at 2:30pm we had an Orthopedic appointment that involved them taking her cast off, washing her legs, manipulating her feet into a new position and casting it.  The cast dried up her legs and toes immensely, twice the orthopedic assistant cut her with the blade trying to take the cast off and my frustration only grew!  Everywhere we went people would stare and ask questions like "how did she fall?" or "How did she break her legs?"  I guess they saw a young parent and assumed I must have dropped my child or been careless!-[FRUSTRATION!]  It took all of God's Strength and Patience to never loose it and always gracefully explain to complete strangers why my daughter had full casts on her legs and she was less than a month old. Cast after cast and her feet looked better but not quite...."feet" other clubfeet babies came in after her and had 3 sets of casts done and their feet would be corrected.  We kept going back week after week for 3 months this process continued. 

 Finally after 9 casts the doctor told us that she would need minor surgery to extend her Achilles tendon and it would only be a five minutes surgical procedure.  Our princess was so strong that day and we had to be even stronger as we left her in the arms of the surgeon NOT for 5 minutest but nearly 2 hours...when the doctor came out the door I nearly pushed him out the way to see her.  A last set of casts had been placed on her feet that would last 3 weeks until the surgery healed  in order to maintain this last corrected position.  After 3 weeks her last cast came off and she moved into the Ponseti brace stage.  Which changed her personality and all of our moods.  She would sleep more through the nights and smiled more, Bathing her, clothing her, and all other activities became easier. The journey was easier smoother clearer.  People would still stare and ask questions but they seemed more sympathetic now..(the difference casts and braces have in outsiders eyes?... I don't know)  Even when we went to Disney World chip and dale didn't look at the camera they stared at her braces and cuddled her the whole time.  It was cute though hahaha.  

Things definitely became easier, with time our princess  crawled and at 9/12 months WALKED!!! Something that seemed impossible at first then so far away.  On her first birthday she was running everywhere and no longer had to wear her braces during the day only to sleep!!!!!!  So many milestones accomplished! Her smile and strength gave us strength in return!  I remember at one of the orthopedics visits seeing 3 little girls coming back for a follow up visit and couldn't believe that they once had clubfeet. One was in ballet class, the other played soccer and the third one was a cheerleader! I couldn't wait to see if my princess would have the blessing off being that active and completely normal after so many casts and surgery...I had read so many horror stories online that scared me into thinking she would never be normal. 

So I write this to tell clubfeet mothers...that yes your child might only have 3 cast and be completely corrected of clubfeet or they might have 9 cast and a surgery, or they might suffer a relapse and have to do more casting and more surgeries...but normality can be accomplished.  Don't give up on your baby, be strong because they are so strong for us.  Your journey is a beautiful one, a unique one, one full of strength and miracles.  Remember:  "God gives his hardest battles to his strongest soldiers!"  Do your research when looking for an orthopedic, make sure that the doctor you choose is actually practicing the method you're looking for, don't be afraid to get second opinions, and rely on family and friends for support.   I'm so happy to say that my princess is a little ballerina now and her feet make me smile :)

Ari's feet before cast, while casting, making her comfortable in the crib in order for her to sleep, out of cast and into braces, the pain she had to deal with was unbearable for us, even chip and dale stared.

Mother of a Clubfeet Ballerina Part 1



Clubfeet Ballerina :)

Four years ago, I was pregnant with my first child and only child (so far) when we went to the most exciting doctors appointment...The one where they do that exciting ultrasound where they tell you if you're having a little prince or princess. The ultrasound tech did all the measurements and then told us we would be having a baby girl!!! Daddy was excited most of all because he wanted a daddy's girl! The tech then scheduled us for another appointment because she couldn't get all the measurements she needed that day.


 When we returned two days later a new tech met with us and as she began to do the ultrasound told us we were scheduled there that day because they had found that the baby had clubfeet and they wanted me to see the doctor on staff... she explained that the baby's feet were turned in and that it was a physical deformity. The doctor then entered and he began to explain that when a deformity of this type is present there is the possibility that another genetic or mental disorder can be present as well (meanwhile I haven't stopped crying since the tech said the word deformity) Hearing him say this just made me more nervous scared and confused...what had i done wrong...why is this happening...why can't i breathe? I could barely hear him speak...he sounded so far away as I picked up only the words: down syndrome, Edwards Syndrome, Cerebral palsy, Spina bifida.

 He told me that clubfeet was treatable and could be fixed at birth through a process of casting and surgery but we still needed to do a genetic test to be sure that the baby didn't have any of those genetic disorders he mentioned and after we received the results I could make the decision of weather I'd like to proceed with the pregnancy.....(did he mean abortion?) At this point I was crying so much I couldn't speak...so many questions were popping into my head and I was frozen couldn't speak couldn't breath. Was I really going to have to make the choice of bringing a child with a mental disorder into this world or to terminate the pregnancy and kill the baby who I had already began to love? How would I make a choice like this how could it even cross my mind. The doctor asked me if I would like to have the test done and I shook my head "yes" then he pulled out this long needle and stuck it in my belly...he told me that doing this can also cause a miscarriage and I would have to be on bed rest. I went home that day and googled clubfeet (which didn't help how i was feeling)

For two weeks I cried and prayed as I waited for the results of the amino test. I can't imagine a worse feeling in the world than being told that your child is sick with a mental or physical disorder. I was sleepless for two weeks until the morning came when I received the call. I couldn't bring my self to answer the phone and when i finally did the nurse on the other end of the phone told me that the baby was fine that the results returned negative...my princess will be born with clubfeet but no mental disorders. I've never been so thankful and relieved in my life. God hadn't left my side my prayers had been answered. I tried not to think about her feet for the rest of the pregnancy because when I ever I did my chest will feel heavy and tears would drown my eyes. I figured I should be strong if God got me through this process he will give me the strength I would need to help my daughter with her club feet once she was born.